how to get 25 nations to agree

lindsay, stephen, and i have given the EU constitution quite a bit of thought. eleven weeks of thought, to be exact. and, seeing as a "oui" vote from france seems highly unlikely, i'd be willing to wager that the constitution that we wrote- 60 fine pages of finite rules- has a decent chance of presenting some new and welcomed ideas to history-burdened europe. sure, we are just a couple of crazy twentysomethings who chose to drink margaritas while composing the afore-mentioned document, but does that make us any less qualified than the leaders and formulators of the european constitution? true, we have lived a good 30 years less than most of them. we were not alive to see first-hand the effects of communism on the ussr. we were not alive when singapore, honk kong, and malaysia were not the asian 'tigers' they are today. but! we bring something to the table that none of the constitution's creators can offer: a fresh, yet-to-be-jaded outlook on the world and a willingness to try something new.

so i say to you, europe, shoot us ucla poli sci nerds an email and we will introduce you to the luxuries of an unbiased rotating judicial branch, amongst other genius ideas. i dare you.

newsweek v. pravda

for a paper whose title means "truth," pravda leaves one hell of a lot out. under yeltsin, russia had seen an original deterioration of the constraints imposed on the press by the Party, but putin has successfully reined in the press, thus creating an institution that rarely dares to wander from regurgitating that which the so-called democratic government demands of it. when it comes to the press, the united states has, for the most part, enjoyed mostly hands-off administrations. unfortunately, as the recent newsweek/guantanamo bay debacle has illustrated, it seems we may be drifting towards the amount of censorship russia has come to accept as normal.

what exactly happened here? a well-reputed news magazine cited "reliable sources" in its printing of an article mentioning american soldiers' treatment of the qur'an. the government got wind of this article, didn't approve of the way the united states was portrayed, and pulled a withdrawl and an apology out of the magazine. they did this even though newsweek had approached a "senior defense department official" before printing the article, asking for his permission... and receiving it. you'd think that if the government found something untruthful about the article, they would have disallowed its printing... but, allowing the article to be printed presented the government with the opportunity to set an example. through newsweek, the united states government has scared journalists into self-censorship. first, it was the photos of american coffins on the shipride back from iraq. (photographers: check!) now, this. (writers: check!) and what an expanse of time between the two!

now, newsweek claims that it will not base its stories on anonymous sources. [see the famous drudge report.] it's interesting that intentions of truth can protect journalists in libel suits but cannot protect newsweek from the thrashing jaws of our government. and the worst part? americans seem to be ok with that. according to a knight survey from january 2005, 32% of american high schoolers believe that that press has "too much freedom," and 37% believe that press should receive government approval before publishing articles.

what are we teaching our children? does the first amendment mean anything anymore? or are we simply trying to bring pravda (please, define as you wish) to the united states?

re butt al

re: the comment posted in response to "dear anonymous skinny dipper"

last weekend, in that nor cal town,
i ran up hayes street hill and down
with the knowledge that i could get caught
behind a wrinkled arse wraught
with dimples.

but, once back in l.a.
and at work the next day,
i did not expect
something so erect
to jump out of the pool
after hours.

forgive me, runner 5552,
but kicking him out was the least i could do.

dear anonymous skinny dipper

i'm sorry for flicking on flood lights
while you stole a swim last night.
it's my fault that
your clothes are now soaked
from dressing in a hurry to hide your hiney.

but, darling, you must understand.
yesterday, the image that ran
through my mind last
was your stark white ass.

you, then, should apologize.
you've scarred my eyes.